So, without further ado, here's my take on the top six, bottom six and eight honourable mentions.
In the words of David Letterman: Here we go!
Best Six
1) Doritos - Middle Seat
Anyone who has travelled coach in an airplane in the past two decades know that the seats have shrunk down to where a bar stool is bigger at this point. And there's nothing worse than getting stuck next to a fat guy, smelly lady, or religious whack-job (like me on every flight from Dallas). But when you have the opportunity to get your choice of seat partner, what you pick typically isn't what you expect.
2) Budweiser - Lost Dog
Naturally, there has to be a puppy/Clydesdale/Budweiser commercial on the top list. This was a beautifully done commercial with an amazing background soundtrack to it. And this just furthers the point that wolves are assholes.
3) Snickers - Very Brady
Seeing Danny Trejo as Marcia is interesting and entertaining. Especially when recreating one of the most memorable scenes in (not Tom) Brady history. Though the most poignant moment was Jan at the end. That's absolutely perfect casting in a commercial if I ever seen one.
4) Dodge - Wisdom
This is a great commercial. Advise from seniors, especially those over 80, is typically brash and true. It seems to me, whoever worked on this commercial to interview the seniors asked them to not censor themselves and give a true answer. Mission completed.
5) Supercell - Angry Neeson
Those commercials for the stupid Clash of Clans game have been on the air for what seems like too long. That's what I thought this was until Liam Neeson popped up in the middle of the game with an amazing Taken reference. Brilliant. Getting the cliche barista who mispronounces your name? Even better.
6) Avocados from Mexico - The First Draft Ever
This commercial came out of nowhere for something nobody knew needed a commercial. Though that polar bear was way too eager to go anywhere other than Northern Canada.
Worst Six
1) Jublia - Tackle It
Sorry, this is the Super Bowl. I'm trying to eat horribly unhealthy meat based sandwiches and seven-layer-dip. I don't want to hear about disgusting toenail fungus. At least this one didn't have Digger the Dermatophyte lifting the toe nail up.
2) Budweiser - Brewed the Hard Way
Apparently Budweiser is realizing they're losing ground to beer that actually has flavour. Instead of saying this is beer for people who like to drink beer, be honest Budweiser and just say it's beer for people who want to get shit-faced without spending a lot of money, but have enough care for themselves not to buy Hamm's Light.
3) Nationwide - Boy
Now, I'm not going to say this was a BAD commercial. It was just poorly executed. What started out with something which had aspirations to be something uplifting from what we'd expect from Doritos or Volkswagen turn out severely depressing. What makes it worse is it's for an insurance company. Might as well make it for a funeral company and say "Your kid could die, why not look into a casket now?"
4) Sprint - Apology
Just when I thought competition between the automakers was getting more and more fierce in attacking each other in commercials, Sprint comes out with this. Even as a Sprint subscriber, I found this to be in severely poor taste.
5) T-Mobile - One Upped
The point of this commercial is clear. Chelsea Handler, great choice. Sarah Silverman? Just stab me now. Sarah Silverman should not be in any commercials. Or TV shows. Or movies.
6) Squarespace - Om
This is a perfect example of poor marketing. Does anyone know what the hell commercial is about? Though, it's good to see The Dude is still working.
Honourable Mentions
1) Nissan - With Dad
This is a very great commercial. Nissan sneaked in the design for the new Maxima in a "wait, what?" moment. Finally, a grown up Nissan design. But, there were three things that took it off the top 6 list. First, using the song "Cats in the Cradle" by Harry Chapin. Aside from the fact that song drives me crazy, Chapin was killed in 1981 in a vehicle accident. Second, the ear-piercing tone used 0:32 in the commercial. I literally had to cover my ears, cringing in pain. Third, it's yet another "love your dad" commercial. Typically I don't have a problem with this but there were SO MANY this year.
2) Jeep - Beautiful Lands
Yet another car commercial with much potential. However, this one missed the mark. Instead of making me want to buy a Jeep, it makes me want to contact a travel agent.
3) Mercedes-Benz - Fable
A well, well known story every kid knows, with a great twist. Amazing animation provides the unique opportunity for Mercedes-Benz to show off their new AMG-GT.
4) Nationwide - Invisible
If you've had to deal with an insurance company, you know this feeling is all too real. This is a great play on the idea that companies shouldn't treat people like policy numbers.
5) Discover - Surprise
Whoever the ad agency behind these commercials is, keep it up. These Discover It card commercials are pretty entertaining, but this one takes the cake. I don't know why screaming goats are so funny.
6) BMW - Newfangled Idea
This was great, since most of the viewers can relate to the unknown of the internet in 1994. However, electric cars aren't a new idea, and it makes Bryant Gumbel and Katie Couric look like idiots, putting them in a position to make BMW explain the car like everyone in America failed their GED course.
7) Esurance - Sorta Pharmacy
Breaking Bad has been off the air for not that long to where it's not relevant. References to shows like this are still entertaining, and the idea that more than two people owned a Pontiac Aztek is still something that can be funny. And even if you hadn't seen the show, there are still enough references to make it funny.
8) Sketchers - Relaxing with Pete Rose
Pete Rose must be hard up for money, if he's doing commercials for Sketchers. But it's interesting that he still looks the same as he did thirty years ago. But it's good to see someone with a sense of humour where he can poke fun at himself.
