2012 Global Car Awards For No Reason!

That's right! It's time to give out some awards.

Now, these awards were originally given out on Facebook, but with Facebook's removal of Notes, it's getting pushed to here.

Disclaimer: A decent amount of these awards are silly, but are given in all seriousness of the car itself. I have personally driven a large amount of these cars. Cars I have not drove are stated.


This has been a great year for a majority of the automakers, with nearly every automaker releasing an important vehicle. So, without further ado, time for the awards!

The "Best Car of 2012" Award

2013 Ford Focus ST

The global Focus was re-released May of 2011, giving Americans the chance to own a proper Focus again. Though, unlike the last Focus Americans were... umm... offered, this new global Focus brings an ST variant from across the pond. 

Offering a unique exterior, Recaro seats, and a 247 hp, turbocharged, 2.0L EcoBoost engine which moves the car from naught to 100 km/h in 6.5 seconds. Ford's Torque Vectoring Control seems to have a magical way to handle that power to the front end and deliver an excitable drive while maintaining to keep control in nearly all conditions. 

On the interior, unique seats and instrumentation pod are the only two major differences over the standard Focus offer a familiar feel to other cars in the Ford family. It doesn't seem too small, especially for a compact car, and the Recaro seats feel quite comfortable, with the exception of taking the car on rutted dirt roads.

The only drawback which has been noticed has been the Goodyear Eagle 1 tires which come as standard equipment. While the tires are quite grippy, the amount of grip is too much for typical driving, and easily pick up stones and throw them at the car. 

The "Mission Accomplished" Award

2013 Cadillac ATS

If you were born before 1985, or have an affinity for dumb cars, you probably remember the Cadillac Cimarron; Cadillac's last attempt at a small luxury car. To this day, even uttering the word "Cimarron" outside of reference to Philmont Scout Ranch is almost a death sentence. 

The ATS is Cadillac's first small luxury car since the death of the Cimarron in 1988. By all means, this is NO Cimarron. Built on the brand new Alpha platform, which is looking to be the future of the Camaro and CTS, allowed engineers at GM to develop a whole new car, without being restrained by the constraints of existing GM vehicles.
After several months of development, the Cadillac team unveiled  a sleek, fuel efficient, luxury car which has several styling cues from the rest of the Cadillac lineup, but something completely different.

Offering three different engines (two four-cylinders, and one V6), and two six-speed transmissions, atop the well tuned chassis, releases a 3-Series (which until the current generation used the same Hydromatic automatic transmission) fighter which appears to be taking der Deutsche down a notch or two.

On the track, this car is very well put together, but it's in regular traffic this car shines. This is Cadillac's proof you don't have to spend $70K to have an fun-eye catching car.

Why is this the "Mission Accomplished" award? Cadillac's goal was to have a small luxury car which would be a hit, and remind people that they don't rebadge cars. And they met that goal.

The "You Get A Gold Star For Trying" Award

2013 Lincoln MKZ

(Not Driven)

Unlike it's platform mate, the Ford Fusion, the new MKZ is a mish-mash of design. With much feedback criticizing the stale and Baleen Whale like design of Lincoln's lineup ended up leading to the hiring of Max Wolff, who came from a successful run at Cadillac. The result? That's still being figured out. 

The exterior design is best looked at head on. Literally. It's about the only decent view of the car. The back end looks proportionally off, and in a side view, it looks like there's about 2 dozen bowling balls in the trunk. 

Strangely enough, with the "committee designed" exterior, the MKZ provides a comfortable and ergonomically logical interior. 

So, to Mr. Wolff and the rest of the Lincoln design team: Your foot is in the grave. Stop trying to build what you're building or you're division will be as dead as the man it was named after.

The "Way Too Overhyped By The Media" Award

2013 Subaru BRZ

With a design you either love or hate, the BRZ has been the "talk about" car for 2012. Yet, with all the extremely positive press this car has received, I'd really like to know if Toyota/Subaru had given media journalists a tuned or specialized version than what the consumer would get off the line.\

This is a great car, if you don't mind numb suspension, loose steering, and a weak engine similar to what you would expect for a 10 year old Miata. (Note: This was not particular to one car, but to four)

This car could be great given an extra 30hp (turbo?), stiffer suspension, and better bushings in the steering, but until this happens, the BRZ is going to be a mediocre wannabe track racer.

The "Kirstie Alley Went Off Her Diet Again" Award

2013 Infiniti JX35

Infiniti (and Nissan) has always had a different design language which never really seemed to mesh with the rest of the industry. The new JX35 continues this tradition. Sitting on the same platform as the Maxima and Altima (in the same fashion of the Ford Explorer), Infiniti brings luxury to people mover.

Along with the Maxima, the JX35 does handle surprisingly well for a 2+ ton wagon, but it's the sheer size of the vehicle which hurts the JX. With the design proportions given make the JX35 a huge boat which pulls into gas stations with a similar effect of the Exxon-Valdez (18/23mpg). Though the size isn't the only big thing about this car, the base price starts off at a steep $42,500, but this does include amenities which would be expected in a luxury line.

The "Someone Needs A New Pair Of Glasses" Award

2014 Chevrolet Silverado

(Not Driven)

Just last week, GM unveiled the next generation Chevrolet Silverado and GMC Sierra. It's amazing how two vehicles can be based off the same components, and end up with different results (See Lincoln MKZ above). While the new Sierra has a very distinguished front end to bring it along the design language of the rest of the GMC lineup, the Silverado's exterior failed to meet the expectations of, well, anyone. While the interior has had a great and highly needed overhaul, the outside looks as if the design department spent all but $75 on the inside, leaving only a change to projector headlights and a slightly revised grille to the equation. So, I congratulate GM on releasing the 2006 Silverado for next year, but you guys definitely missed the mark on an exterior re-design. Hopefully, the frame and suspension upgrades are enough to justify the massive change. And the addition (or re-introduction) of the V6 is well expected.

The "I Hate My Life But We Have To Save The Environment" Award

2013 Toyota Prius C

It's hard to believe that the Prius, a name synonymous with hybrids, has been on sale for over a decade in the United States. Though Toyota has in it's history produced cars which scream "I hate my life" while driving down the road. The Toyota Echo is the quintessential example of this. Though, now that the Platz based Echo since 2005, it was apparently time for Toyota to come up with another self-loather: The Prius C. While the idea of the car makes perfect sense in both a market and a sales point of view, the execution was anything but. The road noise is comparable to a 1st generation Ford Escape, and the driving experience makes you feel like you're driving a box of chocolate. Just waiting for something to fall off, break, or rattle. However, Toyota's expertise in hybrids is where the car really shines. While on the surface, the fuel economy seems to match the Prius, it's in city driving where the C outperforms it's big brother. But it's at the point you remember you drive a Prius where the self loathing starts to come back.



All photos are property of their respective owners.

Tips for College Freshmen

As this is my 4th Senior Year at Oakland University, and today marks the first day of the semester, I figured while I'm sitting in the library and watching all of the new students scramble around, it reminds me of my first years here at OU and a few years back at Oakland Community College and the few mistakes I've done in the past.

So, here's a few tips for new college students:

1) Understand your schedule. If you're on a larger college campus, it could take up to an hour to cross campus, especially in northern states where winter gets in the way. Figure out where your classes are, how far apart they are, and how long it typically takes to get to each class. Most professors start their classes on time and end at the scheduled time, and being even a couple minutes late could result in not getting information and possibly affecting your grade.

2) Transportation. If you go to a commuter school, be sure to get to campus at least an hour before your class starts to figure out the parking situation, and where you may have to end up parking. (See tip #1). If you are staying on campus at a smaller school, see tip #1. If you're on a larger campus (i.e. Michigan State University, Indiana University, etc) where busing is available, determine on whether or not transportation is economically and time suitable.

3) Befriend your fellow students. Especially once you start working on your degree specific classes, most of your fellow classmates will be in your classes for a few more semesters. Befriending them will help in the future in group projects and study groups in the semester.

4) Meet with your advisers. Meet with them at least once a semester just to make sure that everything is going according to how you think it should be going. Don't wait until you have a problem to meet with your adviser. Typically, if your adviser knows you beyond your student ID number, they'll be able to help you more.

5) Meet with your professors. See tip #4.

6) Take advantage of the resources. Every college campus has a library, but most also have learning labs and FREE tutors available that will help you. Did I mention the tutors are FREE!? Don't wait until the week of finals when you're scrambling to cram a semester's worth of information to try and work with a tutor.

7) Go to class. This seems really obvious, but the temptation to skip class for one reason or another may be overwhelming. Going to class will not only get you information covered in the syllabus, but also vital information such as date changes, due dates, and test information. Also, many professors will bump up a grade if you attend class every day. On the flipside, if you don't attend class, you could be jeopardizing your grade.

8) Do your homework. Depending on the class, not all the material will be covered in class. Besides allowing you to better understand the material covered in class, there could be information the professor doesn't cover or there could be questions which end up being on the next test. In many cases, professors who assign homework will make it 20%-40% of the final grade. Just keeping up with your assignments could mean the difference between a 2.0 and a 3.5.

9) Don't procrastinate. This isn't high school. Teachers very rarely accept assignments turned in after their due date, unless you have a valid reason. Being hungover is not an excuse. Doing your assignments in a timely fashion not only ensures you having a better grade, but will reduce your stress during finals week.

10) Plan to take a communications class. (This is the professional in me coming out) While you don't have to take it your freshman year, taking a communications class will not only make it easier to communicate with your peers, but can also cover a required credit and make you more desirable to employers who are looking for people that have communication skills beyond texting.

11) Get out and enjoy yourself. While college is a frantic time,  set some time aside to get out and enjoy yourself. Take a few hours during the week to do something you want to do. Explore campus, go to a museum, or just chill out in the Student Union. Go on a small trip during break to just be yourself and chill out.This doesn't mean a trip to Cancun. Limit a trip to 100 miles away from campus if you don't want to go back home. Better yet, organize a trip with your fellow classmates on a small trip to help absorb the costs.

12) Get plenty of rest. This may be a carry over from high school, but don't party until 3am and think you can get up for your class at 8am. 99.9% of this time you will either not wake up in time, or get to class in time and fall asleep in class. Getting enough rest will not only help in bumping your grades since you'll be more awake, but it'll also boost your immune system. Nothing sucks more than having to battle finals week with a cold.

13) Shop around for books. You don't have to buy books from the campus bookstore. Most of the time the books there are more expensive then they have to be. If there are off-campus bookstores, check the prices there. Amazon is also a great source for books, but just make sure you can get the books before the semester starts. Used books are a great way to save money.

I'm sure there are more tips for freshmen, but I've run dry and need more caffeine.

Boy Scouts vs. Gays

It's been a while since I've posed to the blog, and there has been one issue in the news of recent which has really sparked some anger and engaged some quite passionate discussion.

This is, of course, the recent announcement that the Boy Scouts of America is going to keep it's policy banning gays from being members of the program.

Now, before I go further, I do have to say that I am an Eagle Scout, which I earned in 2004, and I do not have any plan on returning my rank of Eagle back to National Office.

In thinking of my time with the Boy Scouts of America which started in 1992, only one time did the topic of homosexuality come up, and that was when I was 23 and we were discussing our council's non-discriminatory policy which was setup in discrimination on race, color, creed, or sexual orientation. Wait, sexual orientation? Like, gays and lesbians? Yes, sexual orientation. Several councils across the United States actually have non-discriminatory policies for either employment or it's members, which in many cases override the national policy.

But it's interesting, that people are calling the Boy Scouts of America a hate group, since it doesn't accept gay members, and it's teaching young boys that there's something not right about gay people. If this was true, why is it in my twenty years of being active with the Scouting program had I not heard a single thing about hating others? If anything, the program teaches boys to accept others regardless of who they are.

Now, I know the idiots are going to come back with "Well, if they don't teach hate, why don't they accept all members?" Well, why does the NAACP only give scholarships to black people? Why are there hundreds of organizations which promote based on race, gender or ethnicity? The Boy Scouts, the NAACP and the other organizations don't do it to be discriminates, but it's the values they decided to hold.

Recently, many Eagle Scouts have returned their badges and medals to National Office as a form of protest. As I said before, I will not be sending mine back. I am not protesting the program. While I do feel the Boy Scouts of America needs to review their program, they shouldn't fold to political pressure as the only people who would be hurt are the boys themselves. Again, this is the BOY Scouts of America.

Which brings me to another thought. If you have a child in the Scouting program, and you seriously have a problem with this policy, when was the last time you acted like a parent and sat with your child and had a discussion? If your child was to follow everything that happened at their school, they wouldn't celebrate any holiday in December, and not understand why certain holidays are celebrated. That's your job as a parent to explain why they don't hate someone because of what they look like or how they act.

Of recent, President Barack Obama has announced he does not support the policy set forth by the Boy Scouts of America, yet he is retaining his position as Honorary President. While I don't necessarily support the president with his decisions, and it will be a manner of time whether or not President Obama maintains the title of Honorary President, I honestly hopes he realize the number of young men who will be effected by this.

Unlike most of the people upset over the policy the Boy Scouts of America has, I have experienced the program and realize that the program is not about hating someone who is gay, but for developing values which are used throughout a lifetime. As I had previously said, I would support the Boy Scouts of America reviewing this policy in the near future, but at this point in time I see no effect to the quality of the program that this policy would enact.

Vinyl is better than MP3

LPs

The 5th Dimension - The Age of Aquarius
Bryan Adams - Reckless
Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass - Whipped Cream and Other Delights
Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass - The Beat of the Brass
The Association - Greatest Hits
B.T. Express - Do It 'Til You're Satisified
The Boomtown Rats - Greatest Hits
Buckner & Garcia - Pac-Man Fever
Ray Charles - Greatest Hits
Cheap Trick - At Budokan
Cheech and Chong - Up In Smoke
Chic - Greatest Hits
Bill Cosby - The Best Of
Jim Croce - Life and Times
Jim Croce - You Don't Mess Around With Jim
Doris Day - Whatever Will Be, Will Be
Deep Purple - Deepest Purple
Jackie DeShannon - The Very Best Of
Dexys Midnight Runners - Too-Rye-Ay
Neil Diamond - Gold
Electric Light Orchestra - Olé ELO
Electric Light Orchestra/Olivia Newton-John - Xanadu
Eurythmics - Be Yourself Tonight
José Feliciano - Feliciano!
Fleetwood Mac - Fleetwood Mac
Aretha Franklin - The Best Of
The Four Tops - Greatest Hits
Robert Goulet - Greatest Hits
Don Ho - Greatest Hits
Incredible Bongo Band - Bongo Rock
Rick James - Reflections
Billy Joel - The Stranger
Elton John - Don't Shoot Me I'm Only The Piano Player
Elton John - Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
Kansas - Point of Know Return
The Knack - Get The Knack
Andre Kostelanetz - Plays Chicago
Huey Lewis and The News - Sports
Gordon Lightfoot - The Best Of
Don McLean - American Pie
Meat Loaf - Bat Out Of Hell
Steve Miller Band - Greatest Hits 1974-78
Jim Nabors - The Way Of Love
Paddy Noonan and his Grand Band - Irish Party
Pointer Sisters - Break Out
The Power Station - The Power Station
Henry Mancini - The Academy Award Songs
Chuck Mangione - Feels So Good
Martha and the Vandellas - Greatest Hits
John Cougar Mellencamp - Uh Huh
John Cougar Mellencamp - Scarecrow
Men At Work - Business As Usual
Boots Randolph - Plays 12 Monstrous Sax Hits
Boots Randolph - Plays The Great Hits Of Today
Boots Randolph - Yakety Sax!
Lou Reed - Transformer
Lionel Richie - Can't Slow Down
Simon and Garfunkel - Greatest Hits
Simon and Garfunkel - Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme
Stray Cats - Built For Speed
Styx - The Grand Illusion
Styx - Kilroy Was Here
Sugarhill Gang - Rappers Delight (Single)
The Supremes - I Hear A Symphony
Sweet - The Golden Treats
The Temptations - Greatest Hits
Timbuk3 - Greetings From
Lily Tomlin - This Is A Recording
USA for Africa - We Are The World
War - Greatest Hits
Weather Report - Heavy Weather
Flip Wilson - The Flip Wilson Show
Stevie Wonder - Looking Back
Frankie Yankovic - Polka My Way



45 RPM

Blondie - The Tide Is High/Suzy and Jeffrey
Brownsville Station - Smokin' In The Boys Room/Barefootin'
Creedence Clearwater Revival - Fortunate Son/Down On The Corner
Rodney Dangerfield - Rappin' Rodney/Funiculi, Funicula
Sammy Hagar - I Can't Drive 55/Dick In The Dirt
John Cougar Mellencamp - Small Town/Small Town (Acoustic)


Movie Soundtracks

A Clockwork Orange
Alice's Restaurant
All In The Family
American Graffiti
Close Encounters of the Third Kind
FM
Goldfinger
Good Morning Vietnam
Hair
High Anxiety/Mel Brooks Variety
History of the World: Part 1
Mary Poppins
The Music Man
Poltergeist
Shaft
The Sound of MusicStand By Me
Star Wars/2001: A Space Odyssey
West Side Story
Young Frankenstein



Compilations

Television's Greatest Hits (TeeVee Tunes)
25 #1 Hits from 25 Years (Motown)
Keenergold Volume Four (WKNR)
Gilles Peterson - Worldwide (Techno)
Music from Tom Jones/Charade/Pink Panther
25 Polka Greats (K-Tel)
Disco Dynamite (K-Tel)
Hot Tracks (K-Tel)

Classic Cars of the Future?

When it comes to classic cars, there are a few which represent the pinnacle of American Automotive Design: Mustang Fastback Cobra, Camaro, Chevelle SS, and Challenger.

Though through various fuel crises, EPA and NHTSA standards, and the need for lower priced materials, the design of cars has drastically changed since the mid 1980's.

This begs the question of what is going to be considered the classic car of the future? While some cars such as the 2012 Ford Shelby Cobra GT-500 or the 2011 Chevrolet Camaro ZL1 are the quite obvious answers, there are some cars that are overlooked, disregarded or generally shrugged off.

Here's a brief list of cars within the past 30 years could be considered classics.

AMC Eagle

The AMC Eagle was a mish-mosh of components from the AMC lineup. A mixture of the Spirit, Gremlin, Hornet, and Concorde added with a Four-Wheel-Drive system mated to either a plethora of powertrain options including the iconic 4.2L AMC Inline Six created the Richard Teague inspired Off-Road capable monster.

The answer to the question that nobody asked ended up being one of the best selling vehicles in the entire lifespan of American Motors. Today, clean Eagles can fetch anything north of $10,000 as far as $30,000 for a clean SX/4.



Cadillac Cimaron

Don't laugh. As ridiculous as a Cadillac badged Cavalier sounds, don't laugh. As being the car that nearly killed Cadillac, most employees at GM still cringe at the name Cimarron, even if it's in reference to a town in New Mexico.

In a response to rising CAFE standards came the Cimarron by Cadillac (As it was marketed). A response which took a fully-loaded Cavalier and slapped a Cadillac badge on it and called it done. This was GM's first 4-cylinder Cadillac since 1917 and the last one until the upcoming ATS, and produced an anemic 88 horsepower. This was also the first Cadillac with a manual transmission since 1953.

Why is this car special? It proves that even the best ideas are prone to being fucked up. There are bad cars, and then there are awesomely bad cars. GM produced 132,499 examples of awesomely bad ideas.


Chevrolet Celebrity

The rarity of the Celebrity isn't caused by a lack of production. They made a ton of the damn things. However, the Celebrity (and most GM vehicles in the 80's) serves as a lesson in rust-proofing. It is more likely for you to win the lottery than to find a Celebrity without rust.

For most people who grew up in the 90's, the Celebrity has some sort of memory. Typically of being broke down on the side of the road because it's an 80's GM product, but a memory none-the-less.

Not all Celebrity's are collectors. God no. But there are three specific versions which are potentials for collectability: 1) EuroSport. 2) Eurosport VR. 3) Diesel.


Chevrolet Lumina APV (and variants)

Probably one of the only vehicles to have more in common with an appliance than an actual car.

The first generation Lumina APV/Pontiac TransSport/Oldsmobile Silhouette was the first threat to Chrysler's minivan game as GM designed the van as sleek and sporty. Something which hadn't been done stateside. Sales were modest through nearly the entire run of the vans which featured new technology still found on vans today such as power sliding doors, air adjustable suspension, and built-in child seats.

A definite vehicle for the minivan generation, the appeal now lays with those who owned one, whose parents owned one or who are absolute nerds when it comes to car design.


Chrysler K-Cars

Love it or hate it, this is the car that saved Chrysler Corporation after government intervention (the first time). Even with MotorTrend's nod as Car Of The Year in 1981, images of Edward K. Rooney (asshole) still emerge with the Plymouth Reliant.

The full development of the K-Car was based upon two reasons. To somewhat copy what the Japanese competition was doing with making a common platform for various vehicles and to make a cheap car. Obviously something worked as the Dodge Aries sold around 1 million in its lifespan and the Plymouth Reliant flung over the million car mark at somewhere around 1.2 million.

As a side bit of information, this was the first Chrysler vehicle to be produced in the metric system.

But why an appeal? This one isn't about the looks, it's about the lifestyle. Okay, maybe not even the lifestyle, but more of the historical importance for the Chrysler Corporation.


Dodge Caliber SRT4

Let me start off by saying this: Dear Neon SRT4 guys, it's a Neon SRT4. It's not a Dodge SRT4. If that's the case, then so is this. You sound like a fucking idiot when you argue that it's not a Neon.

Anyways, this two-year only bastard of the SRT group proved to be a surprising creature. With 285 horsepower, a 6-speed Getrag manual gearbox, and a wee bit of tuning, the Caliber SRT4 proved to be surprisingly fun to throw around despite poor sales.

While this is the newest car on the list, the quirkiness and potential rarity of this car due to racerboys not understanding how a car works and blowing it up, the future of this car lays in the SRT community who tends to either be absolutely stupid or insanely awesome when it comes to keeping cars.


Ford Festiva

Potentially the smallest vehicle Ford Motor Company has ever sold, was never really a Ford. The debut of the Festiva was based on a relationship of Korean company Kia in which the Festiva was a rebadged Kia Pride.

The 1.3L inline four economy car proved to be a hit as Ford managed to move around 350,000 cars over a five year timespan.

This proved to be the better of Ford's sub-compact ideas as the successor, the Ford Aspire, managed to fizzle away into the oblivion it came from.

Today, Festivas can still be found running around even in the rust belt. Most of these cars have well over 200,000 miles on them but are still in decent shape due to the availability and cost of parts. Clean examples can be found from $1000.


Ford Tempo

A car which became synonymous with a throw away car, the first generation Tempo is slowly becoming cool again.

The Tempo became second in line between the Thunderbird and the Taurus to bring Ford's new aero design scheme which not only brought a new face to the automotive world, but also brought better aerodynamics to cars bringing better fuel economy. Later in its life, the Tempo would experience a diesel variant, all wheel drive, and the first production sedan to feature a driver's side airbag.

The Tempo brought a new thrill to the compact car market with its design that over 400,000 were sold in the first year alone.

Overall, nearly three-million Tempos were sold. Some were good, some were Tempos. A first generation Tempo can be hard to find, but the ones which are still rolling around are examples of ones which were built on a Wednesday when the UAW wasn't pissed off about something stupid.


Geo Metro

The car that said "Fuck You" to large V8 sedans and trucks proved to be the flagship of GM's small car division which was to battle the imports of the 1980's.

The Geo Metro, which was also sold as the Suzuki Swift in the US, had one thing in mind: Fuel economy. Reaching in some cases up to 60mpg on the highway, the Geo Metro was the go-to vehicle for those who wanted high mileage and didn't mind being burdened with three cylinders of raw power. This 1.0L engine was actually DE-TUNED to 49 horsepower.

Sadly, the Metro wafted off into an oblivion as gas prices dropped and Americans went for bigger and more powerful vehicles (Read: SUV Craze). Though, with fuel prices being high, clean Metros are going for upwards of $3,000.


Isuzu Impulse

Sold only for a short time along with it's sibling the Geo Storm, the Isuzu Impulse was a car which seemed confused by itself. While the car looks stunning from either the front or the back, they don't seem to match each other, as if the front and back were designed by separate design teams.

Available with a 1.6L NA and a 1.6L Turbo (in the RS), the Impulse wasn't the slow pony at the show, but due to advancing emission and crash safety requirements, the Impulse wasn't continued.

Isuzu owners are very passionate about their vehicles and take very well care of their cars. While the Impulse is the rarest of all Isuzu vehicles, a majority of existing Impulses are clean and still are eye-catchers due to their oddness.


Toyota Van

In one of the "Meanwhile, in Japan..." moments, Toyota unveiled the Van.

Over a six year period, this bizarre looking creature from the land of the rising sun strutted across America in rear wheel and all wheel drives with a laundry list of creature comforts ranging from a refridgerator, to dual sunroofs, to captains chairs.

However, the short wheelbase lead to a bumpy ride and the ability to do a stoppie in emergency situations. These issues were resolved in the less than stellar Toyota Previa.

The Toyota Van is a rare glimpse into the past, as many of them have succumbed to rust, daily use, and/or six-year-olds.


Volkswagen Fox (Hehe... Fox)

Oh Murr! The Volkswagen Fox. Also known in Brazil (where it was built) as the Volkswagen Gol. VW's response to... something. Not really sure what. Maybe the furry community.

But the 81hp two door had decent sales, and had a strangely high focus on standard features which normally were options on its competitors. Strangely, an automatic transmission was not available throughout the entirety of the Fox's span in the States.

A majority of the Fox production were held to a coupé and a two door wagon, although the sedan was the only variant to entail the full production for the US.

So, why the Fox? Other than it's a Fox, it's the quirk factor.




There are many others that could be considered as classics, so here's a short list of honourable mentions:

Jeep Comanche

Honda CRX

Subaru XT

Furries and the Fury

Note: This post contains strong language.

In the recent past, there has been some controversy regarding the furry fandom and I would like to address some of these issues right now.

To people who are not familiar with the furry fandom or are horrible internet trolls see the fandom as a sexual fetish. Obviously as you and I would know it's not. However, whenever the shit hits the fan and it makes the newspaper, a decent number of commenters try to force the fetish thing as being the only reason why we're furries. As much as this infuriates me, as I sit back and look at the fandom, I can understand why people would think we're not normal, and it's not just for the reason of wearing fursuit, tails, ears, etc.

The biggest issue I've seen, along with other furs, is the actions of certain people at events. I'm sorry, but I don't care if you're 14 or 84. Grow the fuck up. Yes, we're here to have fun, but I don't want to see someone's fun ruined because someone else is being a total jackass. Or even worse, civil infractions which could cause distress among others outside the fandom and give us a bad name. You have to think if what you are doing is going to cause someone else to have a problem. Even something as basic as giving a hug may be very irritating to someone else. Again, I'm not against people having fun, but there is a limit, and there's no reason that once you put on your tail that you can act like a three-year-old and do whatever you want.

When I went to school, there were three guidelines everyone was expected to follow: Treat everyone with reason, respect and responsibility. I really wish more furries would follow this guideline, or people would enforce this at events. Again, we're all here to have fun, but it can take one person to fuck it up for everyone.

I'm Proud to Buy Oreo Cookies!

Just recently, Oreo (created by the Nabisco division of Kraft Foods) has released a marketing campaign of their 100 year old cookie in support of LGBT pride. This is Pride month, afterall.

But within mere minutes of Oreo releasing the image of a rainbow filled cookie (imagine the cavities in that one!) on the corporate Facebook page, comments of outrage and disgrace filled between the comments of praise and support for the company's stance on LGBT rights. Within another mere minues, a boycott of Oreo's had been formed.

Though, this irritates me when I see people comment about how it's an "abomination" and they're "no longer allowing [Oreo's] into my home" about how unbelievably naïve these people are being.

So, to all of you educationally challenged, homophobic, Old Testament only reading, crazies: Here's a little list to help you on what you can and can't use due to companies stances on LGBT rights.

#1) Get rid of your Ferd F-teen thousand. Every automaker has a pro-gay stance with the exception of Hyundai/Kia, Porsche, and Suzuki. I'd love to see how you look trying to tow your horse trailer in a Hyundai Sonata.

On second thought, most automotive suppliers hold a pro-gay stance. Sell your car. Don't drive anything. Plus, you wouldn't be able to get anywhere. BP and Chevron both have a pro stance on gay rights.

Oh, and don't use public transportation. Between the parts that built that thing and the people who drive/maintain/own it... you never know. You might catch the gay.


#2) Unless you have paid off your mortgage, sell your house. Close your bank account. Cancel all of your credit cards. Banks? Yep. You guessed it. Gay-friendly. How else do you think the gays can afford to keep going to the mall? It's not the Jews who own the banks. It's the gays.


#3) Cancel your insurance. All of it. Health. Home. Auto. Life. All of it. Unless you have 'Brian's Insurance Company', a majority of the insurance companies are gay friendly. But again, you never have been too sure about Brian. Cancel your insurance with him, just to be on the safe side.


#4) Stop eating. There is no larger group in the country who has a pro-gay stance than the food industry. It's not just Oreo's. No, it's much larger than that. No Oscar Mayer hot dogs, Philadelphia Cream Cheese, Maxwell House coffee, A1 Steak Sauce, Ritz crackers, Chips Ahoy cookies, Jell-O, Kool-Aid, Fig Newtons, Nilla Wafers, Stove Top stuffing, or Wheat Thins. The scary part is that all of those products fall under the Kraft Foods family alone! So, just to be safe, stop eating. Chances are you may be one of the majority of Americans who is overweight, so just think of it as a good thing.


#5) Have all of your utilities shut off. The phone needs to be the first one to go. With the exception of Altel, every cell phone provider his gay friendly. Now, I know what you're thinking, "But what about the NASCAR Sprint Cup?" Sorry, I understand your somewhat unnatural feelings towards Dale Earnhardt, Jr. and the strange attraction of watching cars run around in a circle at 200 miles per hour, but no more NASCAR.
That's not going to be a problem though since you're going to have to shut off your water, gas, and electricity. More an more utility companies, whether they are through the city or not, are becoming more and more gay friendly.


#6) This one may be hard. Get rid of your gun. While the gun manufacturers themselves have yet to hold a defined stance on gay rights, the munitions makers are starting to stand with the gays. I understand that being able to defend yourself or shoot up in the air for no reason at 3:00 in the morning is important, but I hope you get enough time to learn how to defend yourself using more traditional methods, such as with an axe, hatchet, or children.

So in summary: No transportation, no bank accounts, no insurance, no food, no water, no phone, no electricity, and no guns. Got it?


After typing all of this, I could go for some Oreo's.

My Movie Collection

Available on DVD
28 Days Later
28 Weeks Later
8 Mile

A Night At The Roxbury
Accepted
Ace Ventura Pet Detective
American History X
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Animal House

Baby's Day Out
Back To The Future
Back To The Future II
Back To The Future III
Barbershop 2: Back in Business
Big Trouble in Little China
Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
Big Daddy
Black Sheep
Blades of Glory
The Blues Brothers
The Boondock Saints
Borat
The Brave Little Toaster
Bruce Almighty

Caddy Shack
Capote
Casino Royale
Casper
Catch Me If You Can
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Chicken Run
City Slickers
Click
Clue
Clueless
Coming To America
Congo

Dennis the Menace
Dodgeball
Dogma
Donnie Darko
Down and Derby
Dudley Do-Right
Dumb and Dumber
Dumb and Dumberer

Elf
EuroTrip
Encino Man

Fargo
Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Ferris Bueller's Day Off
The Fifth Element
Four Brothers
Follow Me, Boys!
Fried Green Tomates
Full Metal Jacket
Fun with Dick and Jane

Ghostbusters
Ghostbusters II
Good Morning, Vietnam
The Goonies
The Great Outdoors

Hackers
Hancock
The Happening
Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle
Heavyweights
Hot Fuzz
Howard the Duck

I Am Legend
Ice Age
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
Invictus

Jurassic Park
Jurassic Park: The Lost World
Jurassic Park III

Kindergarden Cop
Kung Pow: Enter The Fist

Liar Liar
The Little Rascals
Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
Live Free or Die Hard

Major League II
Major Payne
Mannequin
Mannequin 2: On The Move
Men In Black II
The Men Who Stare At Goats
Milk
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Mr. Deeds
Mr. Mom
Mr. Holland's Opus
Mrs. Doubtfire
My Cousin Vinny

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
National Lampoon's European Vacation
National Lampoon's Vacation
National Lampoon's Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj
National Treasure
New Moon

O Brother, Where Art Thou?
Office Space
The Omen
One Hour Photo

The Pacifier
Philadelphia
Planes, Trains and Automobiles
Platoon
Poltergeist
Police Academy
Private Parts
The Producers

Rat Race
Reno 911: The Movie
Revenge of the Nerds
Robocop
Robots
The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Run Lola Run (Lola Rennt)

The Sandlot
Scary Movie 3
Scary Movie 4
Schizo
Scooby-Doo
Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed
Secondhand Lions
Shaun of the Dead
The Shawshank Redemption
Signs
The Simpsons Movie
Sister Act
Smokey and the Bandit
Smokey and the Bandit 2
Smokey and the Bandit 3
So I Married an Axe Murderer
Son In Law
Spaceballs
Strange Brew
Stripes
Stuck On You
Super Mario Bros.

Team America: World Police
Terminator 2: Judgement Day
The Terminal
Tommy Boy
Trainspotting
Tremors
Tremors 2: Aftershocks
Tremors 3: Back to Perfection
Tremors 4: The Legend Begins
Tron
Tropic Thunder
Total Recall
Twister

UHF
Uncle Buck

Vegas Vacation

Walk The Line
WarGames
Wayne's World
Wayne's World 2
Wedding Crashers
What About Bob?
White Noise
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

Youth In Revolt

Available on BluRay
2001: A Space Odyssey

A.I.: Artificial Intelligence
Apollo 13
Apollo 18

Behind Enemy Lines
The Big Lebowski
Blazing Saddles

Close Encounters of the Third Kind

The Dark Knight
The Day After Tomorrow
Dazed and Confused
Die Hard
Die Hard 2: Die Harder
Die Hard With A Vengeance

Fantastic Mr. Fox
The Fifth Element
Footloose
Forrest Gump

Goodfellas

Home Alone
Home Alone 2: Lost In New York
How To Train Your Dragon
The Hurt Locker

I, Robot
Inception
Independence Day

Live Free or Die Hard

Mad Max
Major League

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
Night At The Museum
Night At The Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian

The Omen

Pineapple Express

Real Steel

Scrooged
Stranger Than Fiction
Starship Troopers

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
Transformers
Transformers 2
Tron Legacy

Up

Wall•E
The Wedding Singer


TV on DVD
Archer (Seasons 1 & 2)
Family Guy (Seasons 1, 2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
Family Guy - It's A Trap
Happy Tree Friends (Seasons 1 & 2)
Little Britain (Season 1)
Skins (Seasons 1 & 2)
Top Gear (Seasons 10, 12, & 16)
Queer As Folk (Season 1)
Mork and Mindy (Season 1)
Outsourced (Season 1)
The Young Ones (Seasons 1 & 2)